Pay Dirt is Slate’s money advice column. I have a question? Send here to Athena and Elizabeth. (You are anonymous!)
paydirt
My partner and I have purchased a house, have savings in the bank, and have a regular job with a good salary. His parents were able to give him money as a down payment on our house. His grandmother passed away a few years ago leaving him enough money to pay off the 10 percent equity loan we had for the house and put the same amount back into savings. So he now has about six months of our salary in his house. account. It’s been 4 years since we paid off his 80% of the mortgage at an affordable rate. (I keep about three months of my salary in my own emergency fund, separate from my household budget.)
We don’t need more than what we have. Preparations are complete. It’s also privileged. His family is much richer than mine and basically keeps trying to give us money which we always refuse. Because having boundaries and being self-sufficient means a lot to both of us. Yes, his aunt left him a share of the fortune worth more than double what he inherited from her grandmother, which he doesn’t want. He says it’s immoral to get that amount of money that they didn’t earn when other people are having so much trouble. I’ve been working on this issue since the day). His parents are horrified at the thought that his aunt might give him some of what she “wanted to use for herself.” how? Buying a big house you don’t want? We are just overwhelmed and want to root for him. What do we do (besides paying for treatment)?
– First World Problems
Dear First World Issues,
I love therapy as much as the next guy, but here are some ways you can really help him.
Find a non-profit organization that supports a cause his aunt was passionate about, and donate some or all of the funds to that organization in her name. For example, if she loves reading, make a large donation to her or your community’s library and create a space named after her. If she had a chronic disease, donate the money to research into that disease. You can also contact a local school and ask them to offer a scholarship in her name. I myself offer a higher education scholarship named after her cat.
charity navigator is a database that can connect you to nonprofits based on your location and interests. Another great thing about her about Charity Navigator is that it has a rating system where others share their experiences, helping you make informed decisions about who to donate to. Be a game changer and go donate that wealth.
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paydirt
I’m really wondering if I should quit my job. I am 29 years old and have been here for about two and a half years. This is the most flexible job I’ve ever had, working about 30 hours a week, great benefits, unlimited paid time off, and feeling my manager really values me. Masu. I have bipolar disorder and this job has been really great for my physical and mental health as it is flexible, easy to take time off and generally less pressure and stress. I have a lot of time and mental space to manage my bipolar disorder, which is a full-time job in itself.
The problem is that although my title includes “Director”, I make about $70,000 less than other people with the same title in my industry. I live in an area where the cost of living is very high, but I still have to live in a two-bedroom apartment with two roommates and my husband to make ends meet. I have a side job teaching group fitness classes (I love it!), but I seriously need a side job. I wouldn’t mind leaving this high cost of living area, but unless I can find another job, I can’t even move right now. I had a desire to have a dream job despite having a major mental illness and a desire to receive a market rate salary and eventually be able to buy a house and not be dependent on a side job. We are trying to balance the what do you think i should do?
— money or work-life balance
money or work
First of all, I love you and am proud that you enjoy your work every day. If you also have bipolar disorder, you are absolutely right. Managing both work and health can be difficult.
One thing to remember: We’re not talking about co-workers not making much money here, so things aren’t that simple. Titles mean different things to different employers, and it’s hard to understand how they’re interpreted when it comes to figuring out industry salaries. I was once excited to apply for a board position at another nonprofit, only to find that the salary was $15,000 less than his current position.
Have a coffee with people in your network and field to see exactly what their job responsibilities are and compare them to yours. Also ask about benefits packages that include everything you love about your current job, including full-time 30-hour workweeks and disabled facilities. If you share similar duties, there’s no reason why you can’t ask for a raise to improve your financial situation. Review your projects over the past six months and make a list of when you did good work or contributed to the company. If you want a new task or professional training, add it and appeal to your boss. Worst case scenario is they say no and give you a list of things to work on to ensure a promotion.
Finding a new job is always easy. need One. Take advantage of job security and use this time to research companies you want to work for and brush up on your resume. you never know A random résumé you send out could lead to a job offer within a few months.
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paydirt
I’m in my mid 50’s and my partner is older. I think I will continue working as an office worker for a while, but I am starting to think about what kind of house I want to have in 10 or 20 years. We know we need to get rid of stairs and we know we can’t afford to tend our yard. We like living in the city and want to be close to grocery stores and other places to shop. It’s not a situation where you can buy a ranch-style detached house in the city. In my opinion, you’ll be looking for a condo that has all of these things running well. The problem is my mom is obsessed with her HOA fees. She is in her 80s and still lives in the house with stairs where I grew up. She has her children and her step-parents in town who go shopping and help her with her garden and household chores. (This includes me and my partner.) Our children have immigrated to another country and we have no intention of returning to the US.
Please help here. Of the $4,000 a month that retirees pay (pension plus social security, again in today’s dollars), is $700 a month in today’s dollars really that much? It’s a schedule. The HOA should include maintenance of common areas including water, sewers, trash cans, green spaces, and insurance for those common areas. She is going to argue with me in front of her whole family to make me change my mind, so I either change my mind now or am confident enough in my facts to laugh and bite my tongue. Hope you have
—HOA Fees upon Retirement
Dear HOA Fees
In traditional budgeting rules, Dwellings should not exceed 30 percent of monthly income. I was the first to admit that for the majority of the population this is not possible and might be a bit outdated given the current high cost of living. Still, it’s a high enough percentage to target against future housing poverty or, in this case, HOA poverty.
$700 is about 17.5 percent of $4,000 income, so you’re ahead. But again, we haven’t considered property taxes or other costs associated with maintaining the home. You should consider these numbers to see if your calculations make sense.and make sure you are suitable prepare for retirement Paying off other debts, getting the right insurance, and making an estate plan can help you move out of your home. Have fun in your neighborhood!
—Athena
classic prude
My girlfriend “Jane” and I moved in together during the pandemic because her roommate was an essential worker and I lived alone. We figured it wouldn’t last very long and would be better than being alone. We had a bit of a fight at times, but mostly it was in a way that we made sure each other was good for each other, and overall it was great. Except this: Jane doesn’t believe men can or should do housework.